Buggering Up Our Lives, Guys

Let's be honest here, dudes. We're totally screwing things up/over/to hell. Look around. Our brains/lives/relationships are a goddamn mess/disaster/train wreck. We drink too much. Our goals/dreams/aspirations are gathering dust like that ancient cereal in the back of your pantry/pair of shoes you haven't worn since high school/guitar you swore you'd learn to play. We're clueless.

Maybe it's time we tried harder/faced facts/admitted defeat and just accepted our fate?

“Two. Designed for Your Pleasure"

You guys know about this, right? This is the real deal, the kind of shit that gets your blood pumping. No room for wimps here, only those who want it all. We're talking about getting lost and feeling every inch of the action.

• Ignore that shitty stuff you’ve been doing.
• That where the real fun is.
• Take what you deserve: a wild, unforgettable experience.

You're not begging. We’re just saying you the reality.

dudes: Bro Fuck This chick Right Tonight

Look, I'm not Faking it. I'm feeling it right now and I need some Satisfaction. Don't Waste around with BS, just Make love to me already. I'm Hot and waiting for you to Show me what you got.

Man up, I know you want to.

Help! This Bunch of Dudes {Want to Fuck Me|Have It Out With Me Sexually

I mean, come on! It's like they can't Read a Room. I've been trying to Send Signals, but they just {Keep Coming Back|Don't Care . It's getting {ReallyAnnoying.

• Perhaps It's Time I Talk to My Landlord About This.
• For Real| This is getting Out of Hand.

Let Me Be Clear, I just want to Live My Life in Quiet! Is that too much to ask?

Bro's crank Hell Wild

Tonight, we're gonna make it rain. I'm talking about a legendary sesh. We gotta crank it up and live it up. I've got {a playlist on fire|some banging tunes that will have you sweating.

We're hitting the dance floor all night long. So, are you ready to get down??

Let's make this a story we tell for years.

Damn It, I'm Calling the Guys

Sometimes, life/shit/problems just gets too much/out of hand/stupid. You're tired/pissed off/done and the only solution is to hang out with your friends/grab some beers/get wasted. It doesn't matter what you're doing/working on/feeling. Just grab your phone and call up the bros/boys/crew. They'll understand/be there for you/probably click here judge you no matter what.

• It's a rite of passage/guy thing/solid plan
• Liquor is the answer to all problems.
• They'll probably tell you to chill out/make fun of your situation/suggest a wild plan.